So I was just reading and i found this quote i think is pretty cool:

"Tha God is more powerful than all of us wasn't surpising to discover. That God in His infinite wisdom knows more than all of us, again, is a no-brainer. But the realization that God, in all of His power and knowledge and wonder, is more humble thatn any of us is virtually beyond comprehension. The humility of God is perhaps one of His most overlooked and unappreciated virtues." Erwin McManus from his book Uprising

In matthew 20:28 it says (im paraphrasing from memory... haha) that Jesus did not come be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.

It kind of makes me wonder what in the heck was God thinking?? I mean he created us, he knows what we're like, lol.... but still he wanted to come down here and live on this earth and suffer and die, just so we could be with him. and he did all that knowing that still so many people would reject him and not care. I mean, honestly hes the one person who really has a right to be served or to be worshiped, but he chose to spend his time helping everyone around him. If God himself was not too busy to take time out of his agenda and help other people, not just occasionaly but constantly throughout his day.... then shouldnt we be able to do the same?? I mean how much more important is Gods agenda than ours??

I think that one of the best examples that Jesus set for us was realizing that he was not on earth for himself, or for his own purpose. He realized that his life was not his own, that it did not belong to him, his time was his own either, and with that in mind he did not mind serving other people. If we look on our lives with that perspective, then its not such a problem or big deal to take time out and help someone else out with something. and from my experience, when you put others first, especially when you have to sacrifice your time, or your energy, it all works out, it all gets done, and you end up feeling better. and then times when you refuse to help others because you think you have too much already, or you just dont want too, then its all crazy... i dont know.. maybe it only makes sense to me!! but anyway.. those are my thoughts....

So first off... im gonna try and keep this updated more often.... i tend to just write on my myspace blog cause i just put general stuff there, and here i usually put more deeper thoughts.. anyway...

secondly... i have another song for ya!!
Its by superchick and its called Beauty from Pain

The lights go out all around me
On Last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know im alive but i feel like ive died

All that left is to accept that its over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that i made
I try to keep warm but i jsut grow colder
I feel like im sleipping away

My whole world is the pain inside me
The best i can do is just get through the day
And life before is only a memory
I wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though i cant understand why this happenedIi know that i will when i wake up somedya
and see how youve brought beaurty form ashes. and made me as gold purified from these flames

After all ths has passed
I still will remain
After ive cried my last
Theyll be beauty from pain
Though it wont be today
sometday ill hope again
And theyll be beauty from pain, you will bring breauty from my pain

I dont know this just made me think a lot.... like no matter how tough or complicated the situation gets, God has put us there and we can take hold of hope knowing that there is a purpose in our suffering, and on the other sid eof it all, we will be okay, we will ahve grown, and the hope that we had once lost will be our again... not only that, but we will be better people because of it... beauty will come out of our pain... get it?

so we had a guest speaker at church today and he really got me thinking, my thoughts are still kind of jumbled up but anyway- here goes.....

one of the questions he asked is how is it that we give all of our best to our family or friends or even school or our job, and then we try and find a way to fit God into the time thats left-over. Shouldnt God come first in our lives and then everything else? That seems logical to me, but then again, whenever you try to put God first it sometimes seems like everything doesnt work out. At the same time, does everything always work out when we put other things first? or are we just less aware of it? I guess also we should recognize the difference between serving God and trying to fit in all the 'church stuff'. Not that 'church stuff' is bad, its all good, but everybody cant be involved in everything and still have time for family, friends, school, work, etc. We cant do it all!! haha.
He gave a few examples of small things we can do to try and give God our best, such as trying to be awake and alert on Sundays instead of falling asleep in church. If you were planning on having lunch with your friend and they showed up so tired that they not only kept falling asleep in the middle of your conversation, but they completely could not even think about what you were saying, would you not be a little offended? how can we expect to stay out all night saturday and then wake up on sunday and feel good and refreshed and ready to go?? haha, i had to laugh cause that so completely describes my attitude most of the time. I rarely go to bed before 2 or 3 am on saturdays and then get up and wonder why im so tired. and then half the time i leave after 'sunday school' because i know ill fall asleep in the service. anyway, so thats my goal for right now, to try and go to bed earlier on saturday nights so i can be in a better mood and be more coherent and alert on sunday morning. I dont really know all the answers but i figure that this could be a good way to start.......

If We Could Love- Inhabited

Okay, yeah, I know... Another song. (Can you tell I love music?) Anyway, Inhabited is the band, they are fairly new, but totally awesome. This song talks about how we talk and talk and talk but do we ever live out what we talk about. There is so much power and potential in us if we could just spread the love that God has given to us.....

You hold up a sign
You shout out some lines
As she hangs her head down
You talk about love
You sing about grace
But would you take her in
If she chose not to stay
Yeah, we've got to save ourselves
Before we can save somebody else

You cover you guilt
Religion suits you well
But youve got secrets youll never tell
Where's the forgiveness
That we've all known
You point your finger
And throw your stones
Have you forgotten where
We've come from
No man is better than the next one

Oh God, would you move us now
Take away our foolish pride
Would you heal our land
Give us your heart
Oh please dont pass us by

If we could love
We could change the world
Yeah we could shoe them what were talking about
If we could love we could change the world
Yeah wed shoe them, show them
What were all about

Unconditonal, Uncircumstantial Love.....

That's what God has for us. That's what Jesus had and what he lived out every day of his life, in every situation. So hear is my question.... Why do we settle for so much less than that? If we have been forgiven for everything that we have ever done, and for that matter, everything we ever will do, why don't we do the same to everyone else? Seriously... think about it. We have the comfort of knowing that nothing we can ever do will change the fact that God loves us, He always has and He always will.
Look at the life of Jesus. He knew that God loved him so much, and he was filled with that love, but it didnt just stop there, he lived out that love. He lived out an awesome, radical, life-changing love. His overflowing love touched people, and it changed their lives. Granted, Jesus was perfect, and we are not, but we have been given the same love and power that he had. The very spirit of God that was living and working through Jesus, is living in us.
Think about the potential that we have to change the world. What would happen if we just started loving people like crazy, showing an unconditional, uncircumstantial love to everyone around us. Even when it gets tough, when people are being difficult and are hurtful to us or when we have to sacrifice and give up something in order to show that we care. God is showing me the importance of living out a radical, life-changing love, not just talking about how much God loves people and how wonderful His love makes me feel, but living that love out. He is opening my mind to the potential of how many people I can reach and encourage through this concept. What about you? Think about it.....

My Life Is Not My Own....

I have know this for a long time, but it is still sinking in. Or maybe sometimes its just easy to forget.... I heard a guy say one time 'The secret to contentment is the realization that life is a gift, not a right.' So many times i think that we get consumed in living our life and forget that there is so much more out there. I find that when i am focused on my life and what i want it is so easy to complain, to get discouraged and be discouraging to those around me. And days when I am really focused on the fact that I am living with the purpose of bringing glory to God in each and every thing i do, it all just fades away. It no longer matters if I did not get enough sleep last night, or i really dont feel like going to work, or whatever the situation may be.
I am trying to look on life with this view: That every situation, every circumstance has been ordained that way for a reason, the people that I work with, the people that I go to school with, the retarted driver in the lane next to me, the fact that my life intersects for a brief minute with theirs- there is a reason for it. I want to trust God, that he knows what he is doing, cause he can see the whole puzzle put together and all i can see is a few peices at a time. He is not going to put me in a situation for no reason, and if a situation at first seems bad I need to stop myself from complaining or questioning and look for the reason I am in the situation in the first place. But even if I never understand why i was put in that situation, I should still take heart in knowing that God understands, not only does he understand, but he planned it that way, and just knowing that should make it okay.

What would happen if we started looking at every day, every situation, every moment of interaction with another human being as a divine appointment? How would we live our lives differently? Personally, I would watch what I say and how I act, not only externally, but in my mind as well. I would try to be aware that there is a much bigger picture out there, that i am only one peice in an enourmously large puzzle and just because it does not make sense to me at the current moment, does not mean that it is pointless. That is what I would do... that is what i WILL do. How about you??......

Let Go- by the Barlow Girls

Let Go- okay, yeah i know another song... but Barlow Girl is just that cool so deal with it! So this song is about how we need to jsut trust God and go on what he tells us, we need to let go of all our worries about what will happen and what people will think and just do it, cause he has our best interests at heart...

Yeah, I trust in You
I remember times you led me
This time its bigger now
and I'm afraid you'll let me down

But how can I be certain?
Will you prove yourslef again?

What is this doubt in me?
Convincing me to fear the unknown
When all along youve shown
Your plans are better than my own

And I know I wont make it
If I do this on my own

'Cause I'm about to let go
and live what i believe
I cant do a thing now
But trust that you'll catch me
When I let go

Grey- by the Barlow Girls

GREY-
okay so this song is about how it is so easy to be lukewarm- netiher hot nor cold, to play both sides of the fence, to bury our convictions and just try to make everyone happy. But the truth is that we need to stand on what we believe in and ask God to help us make an impact for Him.

Grey's my favorite color
Black and white has never been my thing
I take my drink likewarm now
Hot and Cold is not the thing for me

I dont want to impose
Who really needs to know what I believe
cause no one likes rockin' boats
And who would care to see the way I see

Absolutes are hidden
Ive burried my convictions

I cannot be blind no more
Numb to what Im living for
Help me stop this compromise
That justifies these lies
I need your Passion in this life